Jealous husband: causes and ways to overcome the problem

Life with a jealous husband sooner or later becomes a big problem for his wife. Many women are interested to know where this destructive feeling comes from, whether it is possible to help a spouse get rid of unreasonable jealousy, how to behave with a jealous person, which absolutely can not be done.

Psychologists distinguish possessive, reflected and restrained jealousy.

• The first type involves a desire to lead, turn the wife into property, in fact, appropriate the personality of another person. The husband is trying to deprive the spouse of her usual society, completely subordinate to his will. There is a fear of losing a wife not because of a fatal illness, but because of a sense of ownership, a desire to have another person. The spouse should belong to him undividedly.
• Unfaithful husbands often project their betrayals onto a chosen one. A slight change in her behavior causes a lot of suspicion. The husband is alarmed, begins to look for signs of infidelity, the reflection effect makes him suffer. He is unable to understand that all speculation about adultery is the result of wild fantasy.
• A sense of infringement often leads a man to tyranny. He is trying to achieve self-affirmation through the second half. The main reason for the restrained type of male jealousy is self-doubt. Fear that his beautiful and smart darling may go to a more successful and attractive man leads to total control.

Education and intelligence do not save a man from the appearance of jealousy. Everyone is subject to this feeling. The moderate jealousy of a loving person poses no threat, does not carry a destructive effect. The husband loves his wife very much, trusts her, but some moments bring the spouse to a little jealousy. There is an opinion that feeling can bring a fresh stream to the relationship.

Sometimes husbands exercise control over the wife gently, unobtrusively. They spend a lot of time communicating with their spouses, escorted to work, escorted to the store, met from all events. The wife feels surrounded by care and attention.

There are pathological jealousy who can constantly feel a sense of mistrust, doubt, quick-tempered and suspicious. Excessive jealousy is based on anger, suspiciousness, resentment, fear, hatred of an opponent. The husband cannot independently cope with jealousy overcoming him. Stormy emotions corrode feelings, kill love.

The cause of a destructive feeling may be excessive custody in childhood. A man gets used to be the center of the universe when the whole world is concentrated around him. He constantly bathes in parental love, tenderness, feels constant care. His wife gave him more freedom than he always had, the world is crumbling, the man is not used to independence. A wise woman can help get out of an illusory life.

The difference in age, social status can also provoke the appearance of unjustified jealousy. Changes in the husband's parental home can adversely affect the married life of the couple. The cause of jealousy may be the infidelity of the previous darling. Bad experience is projected onto the relationship with the current wife, the idea of ​​secret treason of the spouse creeps in.

Jealousy can arise not only in relation to the spouse.

The appearance of the baby in the family often affects the relationship of the couple. Attention beloved woman focuses on the baby. A husband who lacks female warmth feels abandoned. The cooling of intimate relations does not suit the spouse, he is jealous of his wife for his son or daughter.

Sometimes a husband is jealous of his wife for past relationships, even in the event of the death of the previous spouse's chosen one. The man begins to think that he was better, more interesting, more successful. It is necessary to make a lot of efforts to convince her husband of his superiority over the former.

There are cases of mistreatment of a wife because of strong, completely baseless jealousy. For some men, uncontrollable paranoia begins, they follow each step of the wife, and conducts interrogations with an addiction. Then beating may occur in order to beat out confessions of treason, which the spouse did not commit. It is very difficult to resist unreasonable jealousy.

Living with a jealous person is difficult. You must initially configure yourself to correct the situation. You can eradicate jealousy gradually, you need a lot of patience, you should talk more often with your loved one, all questions of the faithful should be answered in a calm tone. Answers should not contain ambiguity and hidden implication.

Wise behavior of the wife will minimize provocative occasions. It is necessary to answer calmly interrogations, hints of infidelity calmly, without irritation. A detailed story about the day spent, the impressions received should reassure the husband a little. Awareness of the spouse will help to avoid unpleasant consequences.

The problem will help to cope with increased attention to the spouse.With all his behavior, you need to convince your husband that he is your only and most desired man in life. Romantic dinners, surprises must be systematically organized by a jealous spouse.

It is advisable to always share your plans with your spouse for the whole day, you must inform your husband regularly about your location. We were delayed at work, got into a traffic jam, met a friend - call immediately your betrothed so that he would not be worried.

If you have a sense of competition for your own child, a wise woman will allow her husband to feel like the head of the family. She will listen to his opinion, marital dialogue should not always be reduced to a baby. Caring for a narrowed-up should not be left in the background, it is good when the wife fully trusts the child in the young father. It is very important to find time to go to cafes, guests, movies, leaving the baby with her grandmother or girlfriend. It is necessary to support a man in failures, defeats and in all endeavors.

It is unacceptable to deliberately bring a spouse to jealousy in order to refresh feelings. One must be condescending and patient with a loved one. In a fit of jealousy, a man can turn into an angry lion. Under no circumstances should you compare your spouse to other men. Drawing a parallel between the positive qualities, decisive and skillful actions of the husband of a friend and the less attractive features of your spouse will cause suspicion and anger of your chosen one.

No need to praise a co-worker who helped you solve a difficult problem in the workplace. A jealous spouse will immediately come to mind that you are not only connected by business relationships.

It is strictly forbidden to tell the jealous about their former relationship. His male pride will be hurt. It is best to acquaint your husband with former classmates and friends in person, it is not recommended to spend time with them in the absence of your soulmate.

Flirting with other men in the presence of a husband is excluded, you need to control your behavior and not stare at other members of the stronger sex. You should not wear miniskirts and clothes with a deep neckline for an event that will not be your soulmate.

If you understand the logic of the behavior of a jealous husband, then it is not difficult to deal with his overwhelming feeling. It is impossible to completely correct a person, but it is quite realistic to smooth off attacks of jealousy. Jealousy are torturers and martyrs at the same time, it’s hard for them, but you can save your husband from any doubts.

Caring, love, attention, the ability to find a compromise, in time to calm a suspicious husband will help improve relations. You can fight jealousy with the help of a sincere smile, humor, jokes. It is advisable to explain to her husband that his many advantages are far superior to the merits of friends, acquaintances, colleagues, relatives.

Try to divide the work on fixing the problem into 3 stages.

• During the period of indictment of infidelity, one should not justify and deny. It is necessary to reassure her husband, to make him understand that, besides him, you do not need anyone.
• In response to the insults and bullying of the spouse, it is necessary to indicate the absence of the logic of his suspicions. It is necessary to maintain a calm tone.
• Try to understand together the dramatic situations of the past life of your fiancé, to connect the events that once wounded him with the present moment.

It is advisable for an Orthodox couple to visit the temple, perform the Sacraments of Confession and Communion. Joint visits to the temple contribute to the unity of the family, the eradication of negative thoughts.The initiative to go through the Sacrament of Wedding should come from the wife, the husband will be convinced of the desire of the wife to be together with him in earth and heaven.

Any delay in the wife’s work, missed phone call, other minor moments can trigger outbreaks of aggression by the jealous. Compliments of extraneous men to a beautiful woman and a clever wife make a jealous husband think that he has a rival. A frank conversation with her husband will help to correct the situation. A joint search for the causes of unreasonable jealousy will provide an opportunity to develop a scenario to eradicate unpleasant situations. All efforts should be aimed at strengthening the belief in the loyalty and reliability of the second half.

If the jealous closes, you need to easily bring him to a conversation, find out all doubts, if he leaves the conversation, you should not put pressure on the partner. Your task: to prevent an emerging conflict, find a compromise solution and restore harmony in the relationship.