In order to learn to control his emotions and stop being jealous of his wife, a man needs to identify the causes of this feeling. Having learned the advice of psychologists and applying them in life, you can overcome jealousy, which ultimately will help maintain harmony within the family.
The causes of jealousy
Before starting work to suppress zealous outbreaks, a man needs to determine the causes of their occurrence. An emotional explosion can be triggered by many factors, and the lady herself is not always to blame for it. Many psychologists believe that jealousy is associated with self-doubt, which begins in early childhood. It is the parental relationship that lays in the child a model of behavior in his own family.
If the boy grew up in a full-fledged family in which peace and harmony reigned, then as an adult, he is unlikely to become a jealous person. But if a child’s childhood passed in a single family or if he saw alienation between parents since childhood, then in the future this can lead to problems in relations with the opposite sex.
The husband’s subconscious mind is affected not only by childhood memories, but also by the negative experience of past relationships in which her lover was convicted of treason. For this reason, the spouse may aggressively respond to any contact with his spouse, even if it is an innocent correspondence.
Jealousy is a sign that a man is afraid to be alone. It characterizes a notorious person who believes that he can be replaced. The desire to control the second half will constantly burden the partner, which in the end can destroy the marriage.
Of course, zealous feelings cannot be experienced without love. Many women justify the aggressive behavior of spouses with this. But the more a jealous person loves, the more he winds himself up and more fiercely tries to monopolize his beloved's life.
Suspicion of treason may occur in a man if the wife:
- periodically late home;
- Doesn't always answer phone calls right away
- works in a men's team;
- communicates with unmarried women;
- talking too nicely with other men;
- brightly colored and dressed.
All these reasons have no good reason, but they can seriously complicate the life of both spouses. Lack of self-confidence makes a man control every step of his wife, arranging constant interrogations.
How does jealousy affect health?
Excessive distrust negatively affects not only family relationships, but also the health of a jealous person. The physiological processes that occur in the body during zealous outbreaks can provoke a number of diseases. For example, constant suspicion and suspiciousness will sooner or later drive her husband into depression or cause panic attacks.
Feeling jealousy, a person can cause irreparable harm to heart activity, since this condition is the cause of increased blood pressure and increased heart rate. This ultimately leads to an increase in cholesterol and a further heart attack.
Scientists have proved that pathological jealous people have reduced immunity and more often than others suffer pain in the stomach, vomiting and nausea. In addition, they are tormented by pain in the muscles and joints.
Spouses who do not know how to trust the second half often experience problems in their sexual lives. That is why it is important for them to overcome themselves and stop being nervous without serious reason.
What to do?
Feeling jealousy, the husband, as a rule, begins to monitor his wife. He constantly checks his wife’s mobile phone, asks her for details of the past day, and also requires reports on where she goes and what she talks about. On a subconscious level, the jealous thinks that he is doing everything right. It is difficult for him to understand that healthy relationships are built on mutual understanding and trust. But a jealous husband should understand that paranoid thoughts poison love.
Psychologist's advice to get rid of jealousy.
- Analysis of the situation. This method is thinking about one’s own behavior. A man should try to imagine what will happen if his wife is fed up with endless scandals and a showdown. Will he be able to adequately perceive the departure of his wife? Will he find the strength to create a new family? To avoid the destruction of love, a man must overcome himself and understand that jealousy does not lead to anything good.
- Improving self-esteem. The jealous must stop comparing himself to other men. The ability to value oneself and accept one’s own shortcomings will help the individual overcome jealousy. To do this, you need to constantly remind yourself of the positive qualities and skills that are absent from likely competitors.
- Planning a joint leisure. Often spouses spend little time together, and therefore the spouse simply does not know what his wife is doing. This misunderstanding can be eliminated by taking responsibility for spending family evenings. Frequent joint walks, romantic dinners and heart-to-heart talks will help a man to feel his own importance and strengthen the union.
- Controlling emotions. Before expressing suspicions to a spouse of treason, the husband must soberly assess the situation. Excessive fantasizing and bouts of paranoia only spoil the relationship, while the discord can be avoided if you pull yourself together in time.
- Search for new hobbies. Often the desire for total control arises from the spouse from boredom. To prevent this from happening, he should find something to his liking.It can be sports training after work or activities related to manual labor.
You can overcome self-doubt by visiting an experienced psychologist. Consultation with a specialist will help a man identify the root of the problem and find ways to solve it. Many men are shy about visiting family psychologists, considering this a manifestation of weakness. But it is professional help that can help a jealous man save his family.
In the fight against attacks of jealousy, the involvement of the spouse herself is also very important. A woman should in every possible way show love and care towards her husband and not give cause for suspicion.
In addition to mental therapy, adherence to a certain diet will help to cope with self-doubt and overcome jealous feelings for a man. It is good to eat dark chocolate, herbs, cheese, nuts, seeds, citrus fruits and red meat. But sharp, hot and too cold foods contribute to the production of stress hormone, which only provokes attacks of causeless jealousy.
See how to get rid of jealousy and enjoy relationships in the next video.