How to maintain a good relationship after a divorce?

Divorce inevitably brings change to life. After it, much in the usual way of life will have to be changed, and there is no getting around it. Often women ask themselves whether it is worth continuing to communicate and try to establish friendships with a man after breaking up. And if so, how to build communication, no longer being a husband and wife? How to maintain good relations with the former spouse after a divorce will be discussed in this article.

After the emotions subsided, bitterness and resentment ceased to torment, many couples broke up establish friendly communication. This is absolutely normal, because these people have known each other for a long time. Remaining fierce enemies for the rest of the days is in any case not the best and most favorable scenario. It is much better to have a reliable loved one who is able to support and help. But far from always those who were once husband and wife manage to remain friends. To begin with, it is advisable to carefully weigh the arguments in favor of building friendships.

Consider why it is still worth maintaining friendship after the break.

• You had a close trusting relationship, you know a lot about each other. Even outside of marriage, under such conditions, further support and mutual assistance are possible.
• Children will not be torn between the warring dad and mom. For them, you will forever remain the parents with whom they want to spend time. You will save the possibility of joint relaxation without a tense emotional atmosphere.
• It makes no sense to spoil a good relationship with her husband's parents and friends. Having broken all contacts with him, you will lose friendship with his relatives.
• The friendly communication of the former spouses sometimes leads to the fact that the marriage can be restored.

However, there are also negative aspects of close communication after parting.

• A person can change significantly, especially if a long period has passed after the break. Those qualities to which you are accustomed may no longer appear.
• In severe breaks, communication with a former partner can cause severe pain. In this case, you should wait a certain time. Or to completely abandon attempts to restore relations.

The success of building a friendship after a divorce depends on many factors:

• the reciprocity of this desire;
• reasons for the gap;
• attitude to the situation of family and friends;
• the presence of children and their perception of parental divorce;
• the situation in the personal life of each of the former spouses.

Psychologists have developed several recommendations for girls and women that will help if not to establish relationships, then at least not to perceive the situation "with hostility." Let us dwell on them in more detail.

• Starting communication after a break is often not so easy. Consider the feelings of your ex-husband. If he is not ready to remain friends, do not put pressure on him and do not impose contacts with you. Perhaps the relationship will be restored after a certain time.
• You should not build your new relationship in a pointed and spiteful manner to the spouse with whom you broke up.
• Try not to shift your emotions and grievances to children. Do not set them against the father, do not limit their communication with him. On the contrary, do everything so that their relationship does not deteriorate or end.
• During meetings and communication, try to keep a low profile. Leave grudges and reproaches in the past. Now you are communicating in a new quality for yourself - as good friends.

• Mutual respect will help maintain good relations after a break. Accept the new situation, the new lifestyle of the ex-husband.
• Get rid of the desire to control the man with whom they parted.
• Try not to talk too often right after the divorce. This can lead to unwanted disorders. Try to meet with friends for any third-party reasons unrelated to your past relationships.
• Sometimes men go to tricks and try to establish friendships with their ex-wife in order to try to restore the marriage. If you see clear signs of such intentions, but are not ready to renew the union, do not give the man false hopes. Discuss your decision with him and put an end to this.

• Take care of yourself, do not start your appearance. Divorce is a difficult period, but it is not the end of life. Stay confident woman.
• Do not try, with the help of children, friends or mutual acquaintances, to find out the details of the personal life of the former man. Everything that he considers necessary, he will tell during meetings and conversations. He now has the right to personal secrets.
• If you manage to build friendships after a divorce, do not go deep into memories. Communicate on current topics, share something new and interesting that is happening with you at the moment.
• Sometimes the spouse is ready to continue to communicate, but it’s hard for him to hear about changes in your personal life. In such a situation, you should not hurt him, deliberately talking about relationships with another man.

There are times when after a divorce, former spouses converge again. Often this was facilitated by friendships and confidential communication during the break. But many women may doubt whether it is worth returning to a man.

Building an alliance after this is not always easy, even if the former spouses have a mutual desire. There are certain signs that a man wants you back. Let's analyze them below.

• He is too actively interested in your life, persistently asks your friends or yourself.A man who no longer plans to connect his life with a woman is not very interested in the details of her pastime, the presence of new relationships or career ups.
• A man is trying to see you as often as possible. Often these are clearly far-fetched and insignificant pretexts.
• You noticed that his appearance has become much more well-groomed, he comes to meetings in an atypical way for him. Often men in such situations become much tidier than during marriage together.
• Signs of courtship appeared: small gifts, compliments.

If a man really has feelings for you, he is able to wait and give you time for a balanced decision, which you will not have to regret in the end. Here are some tips to help you make the right decision.

• Do not rush to meet again. Extend the romantic period and test your feelings.
• Discuss your relationship to each other, share the feelings and feelings that you are experiencing at the moment.
• Don’t be silent about mutual claims, because your breakup happened for a reason. Only such a conversation should be conducted calmly, constructively, without emotions, insults and reproaches. Comments must be substantiated and reasoned.
• Prepare the children to live together again. Answer their questions in a way that makes them understandable because of their age.

• Make sure your intentions are reciprocal. Do not force yourself against your will and desire.
• Try to make a decision yourself. Parents, relatives, or friends often try to intervene. But from a third-party perspective, they may not always have objective information, and even more so they cannot experience your personal feelings and feelings.
• Try to analyze your mistakes in marriage, work on yourself, listen to the claims of your ex-husband. The second chance is not always given, and it is foolish to lose it because of your stubbornness and pride.
• Tune in to a positive outcome. Patience and mutual support will help you to get closer and establish a life together.