What to do if the husband offends?

Unfortunately, in some families there is a man’s violence against a woman. This happens primarily because one side allows you to scoff at yourself, and the other side, having a rude character, takes advantage of this. A man who insults and humiliates a woman disgusts normal people.

It happens that events develop as follows: before the wedding he gave flowers, and after the wedding he began to be rude and often insulted. Further more. The woman went on maternity leave and became financially dependent on her husband. If the representative of the stronger sex has the psychology and character of a tyrant, then he will begin to show his importance in every possible way: to scandal, speak in an arrogant and orderly tone with his pregnant wife. If a woman objects, then threats and insults will follow.

Well, if a woman has somewhere to go and get help there. However, there are also hopeless situations. But you can always find a way out. It is necessary to deal with the reasons for the inappropriate behavior of the husband and the options that caused this behavior. And there may be several.

The very first reason is a tyrant husband. It is possible that such a psychotype and before the wedding did not behave chivalrously with his future wife. For example, he could easily push out of the car in a fit of anger or publicly insult. Only a strong sense of love often overshadows the girl's eyes. And many do not want to notice flaws in the nature of their chosen one. And the result is an unhappy life after marriage.

In another case, the man is a real don Juan. After marriage, marital duties quickly get bored. Pregnancy of a wife does not care at all, but even interferes.He wants new sensations, and he constantly searches for them. An affair on the side will cause a breakdown in the family. Insults will follow. A woman can either put up with such a situation, or part with an unfaithful husband.

It also happens that spouses have been married for a long time. My husband’s feelings cooled off a bit and he felt like a “master of life." For example, children grow up in a family, the wife is busy with household chores and does not have the opportunity to earn a lot. The husband is the main earner in the family. If such a man has self-centered character traits, then sooner or later they will appear. The husband will begin to treat his wife with contempt, in every possible way to humiliate and insult. Will get from this and the children.

A woman is afraid to lose her husband, because she loves him very much, or she simply has nowhere to go. In this case, elementary jealousy is included. On this basis, the wife begins to suspect her faithful of treason. Checks his pockets, phone, asks unnecessary questions. Over time, this behavior leads to conflict. The result is scandals.

Another cause of violence can be a sense of inferiority developed by a man over the years. Such a flaw will contribute to self-affirmation through bullying of the spouse. A severe case that will gain momentum if a woman does not provide active resistance.

Another reason is the relationship on the side. A man is torn into two, and considers his legal spouse guilty of this. Divorce will be followed by a division of property. Many do not want this and are afraid. They remove nerve overload due to the humiliation and insult of their wife.

The first law of psychology says that a psychologist should not give specific advice, and even more so require that you always follow them. A good specialist should only direct a person to the correct solution to the problem by reasoning and conclusions that the same person must make himself.

If the husband offends, it also happens that he is often drunk, then this phenomenon must be combated. Otherwise, you will become morally tired and will be able to become seriously ill physically. Constantly enduring tyranny and resentment is impossible. Therefore, you need to make a choice: leave your husband or drive him out of the house (if there is such a legal opportunity) or stay with him in marriage and begin to correct the situation together. Which of these methods is right for you, decide for yourself.

In the first two cases, it is more or less clear what you should do next. But if you can not part with your husband, then start the fight for your happiness and family. This will mean that your situation is not as critical as it seems at first glance. The following tips may help you.

Your husband insults you, finds fault with you for trifles and trifles, constantly brings to tears. The situation is not very pleasant, but correctable. First of all, try not to pay attention to his provocations. Do not cry or be offended. Be indifferent to this.

If he continues his actions, then turn to him, look in the eyes and take an interest in what caused this behavior. Just do it without tantrums. In a calm tone, explain how offensive you are to hear unfounded accusations against you, give examples and arguments. Say that your patience will "burst" soon, and then you will have to leave forever. Remind him of the children who also suffer. It is possible that your husband does not always think about what he is saying, and such actions will bring him to his senses.

If your spouse insults you, do not repeat after him.Try to cry or look very offended. Sit in a corner and sit in silence. His ardor will soon run out, and he will calm down.

Try to leave the family. Take the children away and live temporarily with your parents. If the husband comes for you, then do not immediately open the door. Tell him that you no longer want to see him if he does not change his attitude towards you.

Will come another time, connect your relatives to the conversation. Let them say that they will no longer be allowed to mock you. The husband should feel that you are not alone: ​​you have protection and there is where to go.

The next problem is when the husband criticizes the figure and appearance of his wife, comparing with other women. She says that she is not a very good hostess, besides she has a not very pleasant appearance compared to the appearance of her neighbor. This attitude causes tension in the family. It is exacerbated when a spouse makes comments about a spouse’s action.

This may mean that your spouse has slightly cooled feelings for you. They need to be refreshed. To do this, it is enough to cause slight jealousy. Show your chosen one that other men may like you. Change your appearance radically. Recolor your hair, make a trendy hairstyle, manicure, buy some modern outfits. “Present” a bouquet for yourself (only so that your husband does not know) and bring it home. Answer all questions evasively and mincely. You yourself will see that the husband’s attitude towards you will radically change.

It happens in life that a husband calls his wife bad words, often does this with children. You feel how he treats you disrespectfully, even when strangers are nearby. It really spoils the mood. In this case, you need to fight and be sure to demand a proper attitude.

To get started, put yourself in order (do makeup daily, hair), pull yourself up mentally and physically. Do not allow yourself to behave like very scandalous women. Speak correctly and culturally with children and people all the time. It is advisable that your husband is always there.

When your spouse will be in a good mood, tell him that you are a beautiful couple and you want it to be like this always. Ask your husband to no longer behave in an indecent way with you. For an exemplary family, this is unacceptable. If your husband is not a bad person, and you simply didn’t think about such issues before, then he will definitely respond to your call and everything will work out fine for you.

It also happens that your husband accuses you of everything and all the time. What you are not to blame for: not raising the right way, bring up children, because of your improper behavior, various troubles happen to you and so on. Everyone should understand that it is not good to shift all responsibility to the shoulders of loved ones, especially to a woman.

In such cases, you do not need to get lost and sincerely believe that you are doing something wrong all the time. First, believe in yourself, inspire confidence. Do not make excuses if your husband starts reproaching you again. Calmly and without tantrums, ask him: “What would you do in this situation?” He will definitely answer this question. And you say that now you will always consult with him before you do anything. And next time, consult with him, even for nothing. Do this when he’s busy with something. Let him get tired of it. As a result, the husband himself will make many mistakes. He will begin to realize that he was wrong.

A difficult situation, and any normal person will advise to run away from him as far as possible. However, the specialist must first understand why this is happening. Cases are different. There are many people on Earth, and their characters differ. Definitely, a self-respecting man, with a healthy psyche and morally stable disposition, will never raise a hand against a woman, even if such bring to the "white heat".In the worst case, he will smash all the furniture and even the house, but the representative of the weaker sex will not touch a finger.

By the way, in some cases a woman herself provokes an unrestrained and not quite well-educated representative of the stronger sex to assault. She is the first to insult and humiliate a man. It can even raise a hand and hit on the cheek. It is possible that in this case she will receive change.

Such women can be recommended every time with all their might to restrain themselves if you really want to scandal and express your point of view. To do this, inhale and exhale before taking any action. Then look around. Perhaps close people and even children are near you. Look at yourself from the side of their eyes.

Become feminine and weak. If you are very offended, then cry and go to another room. A man by nature is called upon to protect the other half. He will definitely want to feel sorry for you. And when he does, calmly explain to him what he is wrong with, and express an insult. Quarrels and assaults in your family will end.

A more serious case is when you come across a husband with an inadequate and aggressive character. Here you need to think carefully before making any decision. Any excuses against him will be inappropriate if he beats you up systematically.

It also happens that a woman is very dependent on her tormentor-husband. And she has no one to turn to for help. No relatives, or they do not want to help. You should not endure beatings, but you need to contact the crisis center. There you will certainly be helped with housing, supported morally and financially, until you gain independence.

To do this, stop forgiving your husband. Act according to the letter of the law, the essence of which boils down to the fact that any violence and torture of a person is unacceptable. Failure to comply with the law will be punished. It can occur if you seek help from the appropriate authorities.

No need to forgive, but a solid rebuff. With all your character to show that such attacks with you will not pass without a trace. Psychologists noted the fact that some tyrant husbands left their wives for other women.

In the new family, they became complaisant and radically changed their behavior towards the new spouse. It turned out that the second wife initially made it clear that she would not allow her chosen one to scoff at herself. It follows from this that an inadequate husband can be restrained if you make it clear in time that you are "not a whipping doll."

Family breakdown and divorce - this does not mean that the former spouses will never meet again. Many couples remain to live together on the same living space, as they have nowhere to go, and there is no way to part.

This is where the problems begin. A former spouse can come home drunk and start their bullying. In this case, he forgets that you have become practically strangers. Thus, the "ex" is trying again to gain power over you.

You can ask for help in special services designed to monitor the order. At the same time, try to divide your living space and embed the locks in your half of the apartment. Such a measure will psychologically separate your ex-husband from you.

Do not respond to insults and humiliations. Pretend that for you this person simply does not exist. Get to know another man. Perhaps his appearance in your life will turn the situation around. The ex-husband will understand that everything has changed radically and will cease to show interest in you, and at the same time, insults will disappear.

There are frequent cases when ex-spouses went on a divorce unconsciously. Both still had feelings that they had for each other over the years.Perhaps your spouse is trying to reconcile with you. He only does it ineptly, exactly as a schoolboy would pull it, pulling his classmate for a pigtail.

Do not judge him strictly in that case. Consider establishing a relationship. If your children are growing up, then reconstituting a marriage will be a natural conclusion to your family drama. Make a decision and talk with your husband about this topic. In this situation, he will accept your offer with pleasure, and as a result you will again become happy.

A crisis in a relationship is not the final sentence. You can still fix it if you have a great desire. However, remember that your husband should also want to rectify the situation. Otherwise, the following tips are simply meaningless. So that the divorce does not take place, then start acting step by step.

• You are not divorced, and romantic relationships still happen between you. Try at this moment to remind your husband about your meetings, about your love. How did you meet, how was the wedding, and so on. Perhaps this will stir up new feelings in your spouse, and he will stop behaving inappropriately.
• Call your husband to the cinema for a walk. On the way, remember how happy you were. Tell your spouse what is happening in your soul now, how hard it is to endure such humiliations and insults from a loved one. Give an example of the phrases your spouse says when he tries to humiliate you. Perhaps, being in such a good mood, he will look at himself from the side and will be ashamed of his behavior.
• It is better not to contact friends for help, but if there is no other way, then ask them to speak with your husband. Let someone from the outside tell your spouse that he is doing wrong with you.
• Remind your spouse that children grow up in your family, and his aggressive behavior is simply unacceptable in this situation.