A refrigerator, a sofa, a closet, a husband, winter preparations - this is how most women present their home, calling it a “full bowl”. And according to generally accepted rules, the way it is. However, if you look at the bottom of this very bowl, you can easily see the mass of cracks. The refrigerator is empty, the sofa creaks, the closet is clogged with clothes from student days, the husband often lingers at work. But to get out of this vicious circle, it is most often difficult for a lady only because it is “not accepted”. And by this example, there are millions, because for them it is a template. This is how our template thinking manifests.
What it is?
Template thinking is not an innate ability, but an acquired ability. And the longer we live, the more framework rises around us. The child is told that semolina and fish oil are good, and chocolate is bad. He listens attentively and even pretends that he agrees, and how not to agree, you want after all that mom and dad were satisfied, and there is no particular choice. And reaching a conscious age, the child suddenly discovers that sweets are tastier than oatmeal and more often than not they throw on the “forbidden fruit”.
In the best case, this threatens an increase in body weight, in the worst - distrust of parents who, by imposing their template on him, were simply deceiving. And this is only the beginning of life.
Further discussions about what is “good” and what is “bad” will become even greater. I didn’t enter the institute - it’s a bad thing. Not married until 23 years old - unhappy. Did not build a career until 30 - loser.
Or maybe it's not so bad? Having received a working profession in college, you can earn several times more than a university graduate receives.You can get married later, but not for the first person you meet, but really for a worthy person. And it’s never too late to start a campaign up the career ladder. But it’s easy to say, what will others think about this?
Very often this thought not only deprives us of simple human happiness, but also closes the road to perhaps outstanding discoveries and achievements. Did Malevich, creating his Black Square, think that critics would talk about him? But Bulgakov, working on his works, was afraid of the conviction of the crowd?
The same applies to scientific discoveries, and research in the field of medicine, biology, astronomy. None of this would have happened if everyone had lived exclusively according to the laws that are dictated to us at every step of our life's journey. There are, of course, rules, which violate, therefore, contradict common sense. Need to sleep, eat, drink. The whole question is in time, quality and volume.
This rebound camp takes place at 9 pm. And if you don’t sleep in adulthood, maybe it’s better to do business, at least read, and not drink sleeping pills? The alarm clock will ring at only 7, and you already two hours how can not sleep? So, maybe not waiting for a signal to the beginning of the active phase of life, but getting up, doing exercises, putting things in order in the kitchen, reading, in the end?
Try to at least get away from stereotypes, if, of course, you have not parted with them for a long time.
Signs
Analyze how do you react to how a child (colleague, friend, relative) solves this or that problem. Does it annoy you that the kid, instead of building a house of cubes, places them on the floor in a staggered (any other, understandable only to him) order?
Do you think that a comrade is always looking for “difficult” ways to achieve his goal? Have you stopped talking with your aunt, who at 55 decided to marry a Turk? You have an unambiguous diagnosis - stereotyped.
Effects
Living in a stagnant state or being superextravagant in decision making is everyone's business. But it’s better to find a middle ground. Otherwise, it’s easy to bury talent in the ground - both your own and your child. And sometimes not only mine. How many teachers do not give the opportunity to freely create, how many act exclusively within the framework of methodological recommendations! As a result, Petya, who was the best student in the first grade, is not interested in anything by the end of the third. He is bored in the classroom, he does not want or cannot even become like everyone else.
A similar thing can happen with a talented young employee who is trying to prove to more experienced colleagues that it is irrational to use an old computer program. When everyone up to the leadership for the umpteenth time asks him not to get into his own business, he will stop doing it. And either merge with the gray mass of colleagues, or find another job.
A wife who is trying to prove to her relatives that it is not necessary to do the cleaning every weekend, it is better to spend them outdoors (at the theater, museum, cinema), faced with a misunderstanding, will either run away or become a housewife in the worst sense of the word. And then the likelihood that her husband will already run away from her is very high. And then - stress, depression, alcohol and other troubles.
Ways to Overcome
Remember yourself in childhood. What made you change your bright clothes to a gray suit? Who prevented becoming an artist? Why do you spend alone every evening? How did it happen that a hole formed in the wallet? Maybe the whole point is that at some point you stepped on the throat of your own song? Then it's time to regain your "I".
- Stop thinking like everyone else.
- It is necessary to stop evaluating each step from a "height" surrounding society.
- We change the circle of communication. No need to remove all buddies and friends from the phone book. Better expand the boundaries. Enter English courses, for example, - studies develop. And at the same time, new comrades will appear.
- Throw away all books prescribing what a real lady must do before she is 25 years old. or describing the rules of life of a true gentleman.
- We broaden our horizons. Throw rags, buckets, hammers, shovels, rakes over the weekend and go to the theater. And look at others, and you will show yourself, which means you have to put your appearance in order.
Tips & Tricks
Outside thinking does not tolerate prohibitions. Stop restricting yourself to atypical and non-standard. Yes, a healthy diet is good, but sometimes allow yourself a piece of cake. From time to time, allow yourself to sleep before dinner. Do at least one crazy thing a year.
And the advice is simple for all skeptics and critics - smile. After all, you can allow yourself to share the joy just like everything else. So do not be greedy. Although, your business is how to behave in a particular situation. Following the tips is also a template.
