How to understand what a guy is cheating on and what to do?

Many consider love the main meaning of human life. It is this feeling that drives all of our brightest impulses, inspires and inspires us, but under one important condition - the feeling must be mutual. Unfortunately, not all relations are cloudless, and even the most harmonious unions pass various difficult tests. One of these tests is the betrayal of a loved one.

Representatives of the fair sex often ask questions about what is missing from a man next to a woman and what exactly pushes him to treason. What is the psychology of betrayal in general? It is wrong to believe that only polygamous male nature is to blame. After all, it happens that, moving away from one companion, a guy starts a relationship with another girl and behaves towards her much better, is more reverent, takes more care and does not even think to change, especially the first time when passion boils in his blood, and from surging feelings, my head is literally spinning. But this candy-bouquet period is quite fleeting, and most often after it is followed by a more calm and measured stage of relations, in which the first serious disagreements and difficulties may appear.

Of course, in the betrayal of a man, there is definitely a woman’s fault.This does not refer specifically to her fault before him, but first of all to herself, that at some point she forgot about herself, completely disappeared into the person, went in cycles in him. Perhaps the man gave some signs, wanted a break in the relationship, as it is often called, a little fresh air. Perhaps the relationship needed a break, because parting is also measured by love.

During breakups, people have time to rethink their relationship, reconsider the situation, and it often happens that after a truce the situation in the pair becomes much better. True, it happens, and vice versa, when people in separation finally understand that their union no longer has a future and cannot be. And even in this situation, there is a plus: the absence of a result is also a result, and you will not spend your precious years of life on meaningless and unpromising relationships. How exactly the situation is resolved will depend on each specific case and on the behavior of the man and woman.

Before dramatizing and discussing the betrayals of the second half, you first need to make sure that there are real reasons for mistrust and whether everything is really so bad as it seems, or is it just paranoia and fabrications of violent girlish fantasy. If a man does not call for a long time, perhaps he is not deceiving you, but the truth is busy at an important meeting and that is why he cannot answer an incoming call. Or, perhaps, a fateful set of circumstances intervened, and your beloved did not pick up the phone for two hours due to accidentally turned on silent mode in a mobile phone.

But we must not forget: the more time a girl winds herself up with speculation and conjecture, the more negativity accumulates in her and the more likely outbursts of anger and jealousy in sorting out a relationship with a dear person. And it certainly will not help strengthen the union. On the contrary, the man will gain confidence that next to him is a hysterical and dissatisfied woman who is not self-confident. In this case, it is better to follow the principle: "Do not follow the man, but better watch yourself." But at the same time, if such alarming cases are repeated constantly, you can’t turn a blind eye to the situation and pretend that nothing strange is happening, and you don’t notice anything at all.

Many women who were cheated often noticed that during a quarrel, in a fit of anger, a man could rush to throw a phrase that served as a kind of “alarm bell”, for example: “If you get me, I’ll go to another one!” or "I can’t stand your tantrums; there are girls with a character much better than yours!" Of course, such statements do not appear just like that, from scratch. At such moments, it’s really worthwhile to beware and reconsider your attitude to the current situation.

Some women have such a subtle sense of intuition that even at a distance they feel something is amiss. They notice how a man behaves, not like before, and mentally is not next to her, but is floating somewhere in the clouds. A sign of betrayal may be regular unanswered calls, frequent lateness of your soul mate on some specious pretexts, for example, increased employment at work or meeting with a long-standing friend or acquaintance. Perhaps he is not lying to you, but he was really busy, but with often repeated lateness and excuses, there is reason to beware.

But it’s extremely difficult to understand exactly what a person has changed, without catching him by the hand, unless there are any clear signs of betrayal, which include:

• Messages with a romantic context, addressed not to you;
• traces of lipstick on clothes;
• the subtle scent of other women's perfumes;
• the availability of contraceptives (if you are not using them with a man).

Recognizing whether a man is cheating is often very difficult. In these matters, the male environment adheres to the principle of non-disclosure and strict conspiracy. As in the old joke: “I called my husband’s friends to find out where he is: six spent the night, and four still sleep!” Men often try to hide the fact of betrayal to the last, except when they have already firmly decided to leave with another woman whom they love and who decided to start a family or start a serious relationship with. And this, alas, also often happens.

The most offensive to treason is the feeling that you are neglected, betrayed, because it is your self-esteem that suffers the most, which is why it is so difficult to survive treason. Only people who are unclean on hand in this matter (also cheating) or who do not like their companion at all can tolerate betrayal. In these cases, the couple can continue to exist when a woman pursues some selfish goals and rationally approaches the issue of relations, lives at the expense of a man or uses it in some other way. Love in such cases is usually out of the question, and the fact of betrayal is perceived calmly and even with relief: “Well, finally! I found myself someone. Maybe now it will bother me less. ” However, such situations are not common.

A loving woman, learning about adultery, always experiences shock. Her feelings often replace each other: from anger and rage to passion and desire to return a loved one. At this time, her emotional state is very unstable, and psychologists really do not recommend making important decisions in a hurry. It is important to weigh and ponder everything, try to regain your composure, refrain from insulting your lover and cheated husband, and this is sometimes extremely difficult to do. The best option in this case is the distance. How often did everyone hear the saying: "To keep it, you need to let it go." But it’s easy to say, but hard to do in real life. It’s hard to imagine that you will not be able to fall asleep and wake up now with your already own man. In this case, volitional behavior will play a decisive role: will there be enough willpower to part with a changed person, will it be possible to restrain all angry feelings inside and not run to his first whistle.

It is important to realize that if you behave correctly and let the man gowhile preserving your face, without insults and damnations in the trail, after some time you yourself will feel better, you will feel that you behaved beautifully, restraining aggression and anger. The better you leave an impression when you part, the higher the likelihood of a new, prosperous relationship with another person who will love and appreciate you, because the whole white light on one man has not come together. In fact, there are many worthy and good people with whom you can create a couple and build a successful relationship.

After parting with a man, a woman needs to diversify her leisure time as much as possible, for example, sign up for fitness or cutting and sewing courses. It is not so important where exactly to start going - the main thing is that she should have as little free time as possible, which could be spent on sadness and resentment, on memories and regrets. After parting with a dear person, everyone experiences pain and suffering. Unfortunately, it is not so easy to get rid of them, and the best doctor, as you know, is time.But you can significantly alleviate the experience by reconsidering your attitude to the current situation, and try not to concentrate on your negative emotions, stop thinking about your failure. It’s best to do something useful for yourself and your close relatives, who are so in need of care and affection, because it is they who will never betray and will always love us for who we are.

Unfortunately, there are often broken families with children, in which wives manipulate parent-child relationships during divorce, forbid the father to see his children in order to keep the husband and have leverage over him. It is strongly discouraged to do this, because the child is not at all to blame for the fact that his dad fell in love with another woman and no longer wants to live with his biological mother. Ideally, the child should not observe the scandals and proceedings of the parents. It will be more pleasant for all parties to the conflict if the issue is resolved by peaceful diplomatic means in which children will not suffer.

Is it worth it to forgive treason, decide, first of all, the woman herself. If a man rethought his behavior and sincerely repents, then, of course, you can and even need to forgive him, because everyone has the right to make a mistake. But it is important to remember that if a man is forgiven, it is better not to remind him of this incident at the first convenient conflict case. It also happens that a man realizes too late that he was wrong and went in vain about his feelings, and his ex-girlfriend or wife is already happy with another person.

To find out that a man is cheating, see the next video.